But my blog shall remain talking about my childhood, because Adult-Blogs are a dime a dozen.. so I will keep mine to myself.. except for 1 thing. I need to talk about the American people! Comparing them to any other people I ever met.. They are the most kind, helpful, compassionate wonderful bunch on earth! And I mean it.
And here I can finally answer my question:”Who is Jesus?”.
Some American Christians came to my door inviting me to church. I argued with them a lot, telling them that my father was a Lutheran pastor and there was absolutely nothing they could tell me that I didn’t already know.
A bit arrogant, yes? A lot, I think.
They handed me a book, sort of casually.. but I did read it. It was “The Late Great Planet Earth” by Hal Lindsey.
And here I finally get the answer to my question, the one about ” Jesus ” God Bless you Hal. you did a fine job in that book! it humbled me so much.. and it freed me at the same time.
Here, here’s the answer that brought me to my knees.. and my life was never the same again.. in an incredibly good way. Jesus.. son of God, how and why? God sent Jesus to become a human to really understand what we are going through. He walked this earth like you and I.. and I keep thinking, He might have experienced hunger too, don’t know this for sure. But for me, it was important that He knew all of my pains. But.. He did so much more.
He took upon Himself all of my terrible sins, so that I would not have to pay for them. Yes.. He did this for me.. and everyone. He paid the ultimate price too.. a terrible death. The victory of the Rising again from the death, what does it mean to us? That we have a life after this tough one here on earth, and we get to live with God. Wow! So.. Jesus was a man, yet He also was / is God. Yes.. Jesus is God.. and finally I had my long sought answer: Jesus is God! What to do after receiving such knowledge? I fell on my knees asking Him to forgive all my sins.. and from here on, take my heart and my life Lord.. I am yours, I belong to you Almighty God. Thank you, thank you for loving me so much to reveal yourself to me, as to Who You are, what mercy.. what Love.
On my knees in our front room.. my mind wandering back home to my dad’s little church. And suddenly.. everything lit up, I understood all those scriptures I had learned and memorized. Suddenly they all made sense! It was as if a light was shined on it all. I understood now, and much of deep held pain and anger and horrible memories seemed to soften and my heart felt so light. The pains suddenly were gone. I was free!
I got up from my knees and called a girlfriend.. because I was bursting with joy and I just had to share. This joy is still with me, it never left me. I do never hang on to guilt, shame or other things that so like to hang on to us and drag us down. No.. I give these things to God immediately, before they have a chance to hurt me.
Forgiveness is mine.. all I need to do is ask for it, and do try and not repeat those things I just asked forgiveness for. But those are things each of us have to experience for ourselves, to better understand. This I had to share.. because it is who I am. This did happen to me because of some kind and unselfish Americans… who worked their way through my German thick head.. with patience and love. God bless them! America.. indeed, the land of freedom.. and full of wonderful people like nowhere else on earth.. God bless America!